Management often likes to brag to the press and interviewees that their business operates like a family. Unfortunately, some project managers buy into this fairy tale and try to imbue this same family culture into their team, whether or not the team actually wants it. The results are often even more destructive than before they even tried it.
So why is wanting to operating like a tight, close-knit group such as a family such a bad thing?
1. Its not for everybody
Many of us treasure our workplace relationships. We meet some great people there, some of whom become valuable companions and lifelong friends. But not everybody in the office is there to connect. Some are just there to work, and dont care about starting friendships or developing bonds. They dont care about family culture. In fact, it may even make them uncomfortable. Having it forced upon them actually alienates them more, even as others buy in to it.
2. It sounds (and is) pretentious
Just like the leader with an open door policy who doesnt actually mean it, team members can smell insincerity a mile away. The more someone brags about family culture management, the less likely they are to actually follow it. Team members dont buy empty words. They pay attention to how project managers actually speak, how well they listen, and whether they treat all employees fairly. Slapping someone with an unjust reprimand and labeling it tough love isnt going to fool anyone. Neither are half-baked team building exercises.
3. The actual family unit is small
True family-style relationships develop over time between a core group of people which may or may not cover an entire team. Theyre rarely announced as company policy, because such things are difficult to implement and ridiculous to enforce. Unless your company is small (maybe less than a dozen), its rare for the family-style intimacy to extend past a few key individuals. As a result, people outside this tight-knit group may feel excluded and ostracized. This may lead to resentment at not being part of the in crowd.
4. Not all families are good ones
Not all families get along. There are abusive relationships, broken families, and awkward pairings. Every single one of those is a family relationshipjust not a healthy one. In labeling your company culture as a family relationship, you risk opening yourself up to ridicule from your employees, who know better than you where the warts are in your faade of familial integrity.
True family-style businesses are a rare and precious thing, and relationships like those can never be imposed or decided on as a matter of policy. Its up to you, as a project manager and leader, to show the way by actually becoming a sincere, caring parent to your team. Once youre able to do that, only then can you truly claim that your team is run like a family.